You’ve Heard Of Gratitude Lists….But Have You Needed A “This Sucks A$$” List Too?

Why It’s Important to Be Grateful (especially when it’s REALLY hard

In October we celebrate Thanksgiving which to me is an extra reminder to reflect on things I’m grateful for in life.

In a world that often seems cruel and harsh where many people go hungry,  or are alone with no family to visit, it can be difficult to find things to be thankful for.  Or we do feel extremely grateful….but we may feel guilty for having so much while others appear to have so little.

Being thankful and grateful is a choice.  Yes, I believe everyone can always find something to be grateful for.  BUT, what happens when we are thrust into a particularly challenging time in our lives through no fault of our own; whether it’s losing a loved one, losing your job,  or losing your home.

Piling on platitudes doesn’t seem like the right thing to do.  I think there is real danger in telling folks to wake up and just feel positive ALL THE TIME; especially when life has thrown you a massive curve ball.

Forcing yourself to “suck it up” and say, “Oh well, life goes on”, when you just aren’t believing that to be true, does more damage than faking it.

Research has proven that bereaved people who deny their feelings of grief, recover more slowly.  Experiments have shown that people who were told not to try and feel sad about upsetting news, only felt worse.

Being a spiritual and optimistic human doesn’t mean your life is always full of rainbows and unicorns. We are Spirit Energy in human form dealing with ALL that this life has to offer us. And to deny that shadow part is like cutting off a piece of ourselves.

“Discomfort is the price of admission for a meaningful life.”~Susan David~Harvard Medical School psychologist

When things are totally sucking for you, don’t write a gratitude list just yet….You need to write a “This Sucks A$$” list first. You are allowed to be honest about how bad you are feeling and not feel ashamed about it.

Ingratitude lists first help you grieve the things that you lost, missed out on, been cheated out of or anything that has really kicked you in the heart. Stuffing down anger and sadness with a stack of gratitude lists doesn’t make them go away.

Writing down things that make you miserable won’t make them go away either.  BUT, it will help you focus on the things you want to change.  Writing an ingratitude list can you direction, focus and help you move away from shame and toward acceptance and action.

Susan David says,

“The research shows that the radical acceptance of all our emotions-even the messy, difficult ones is the cornerstone to resilience, thriving and true authentic happiness.”

Amen to that.

Being told to express gratitude isn’t something new. You’ve heard it many times; probably over and over and over….and over.  But have you wondered why the subject keeps coming up?

It’s because the Universe has a language.  It doesn’t speak in words.  The Universe responds to your VIBRATION.  And we create vibrations through our EMOTIONS. 

When we choose to appreciate pleasing things around us, we cant help but raise our vibration. And we start to attract any and all positive things into our lives.

This is not hippy-woo-woo stuff.  This is actually Quantum physics.

Quantum physics applied to positive thinking state that the vibrations of your thoughts affect and modify the reality around you.


Gratitude may not be your natural state and that’s ok and it may take some work on your part.

The next time you are going through one of the challenging times in life (and you will have them again and again), write your “sucky list” but don’t dwell there. 

Use it as a tool to HELP you move forward on your own time making sure you actively choose forward motion…even in baby steps.

And then begin to add the things you ARE grateful to have in your life. In doing so you start to train your mind AND match your vibration on a more CONSISTENT level to the Universe.

This is a soft, subtle and easy change you are making in order to be a vibrational match to your desires.  And every day you do this you are weakening resistance between your belief system and that which you desire.

Big stuff, I KNOW! You got this!! Because you ARE a strong, resilient and amazing soul navigating this human experience with flying colours.